Bear with me as I have a teeny tiny pity party......
With one month to go in this deployment, I am weary. The solo parenting is wearing thin. The teething baby has been fussy for weeks and wakes up every two hours screaming. The worrying about "what would I do if (insert terrible thing) happened....." is getting old. The cars that ran perfectly before Micah left have been in and out of the shop--6 times between the two of them. (On Sunday I was home bound with not one, but two broken down cars. How is that even possible???) All of the maintenance required to run a home starts to feel overwhelming when you are doing it alone.
All this to say, I am trying to remember that I have two healthy children. And at least I HAVE two cars that usually work and are paid for. And my husband is safe. And we are all in good health. And I have a beautiful place to live, however temporary it may be. And as Micah says "Time will pass, it always does". And you want it to pass quickly so that you can have your family back together, but you don't want it to pass too quickly because your children are growing up too fast and you want to soak up every second.
---End pity party---
An eternal optimist I am not, but I am trying to keep things in perspective here. I live a very blessed life. So now for a few things that make me happy, in no particular order.....
A table (or two) full of friends. We like dinner parties. A lot. I'm going to miss the regular dinner rotations when the husbands all come home.
Crabby little sweet cheeks. He can't help that it hurts:(
Just another day of doing crafts in a princess dress....
Love fresh flowers, love the silver tray from my mom, and love my trifle dish.....a trifecta of pretty.
Jenn sent me this wooden bowl from Hawaii and it's my new favorite.....square and wooden...awesome.
I had to smile when I was doing laundry today and counted six tutus on the drying rack (yes I realize how excessive that is). Skylar has dragged out every tutu in the house size 18 months-4 years and wears them at some point every day and to bed most nights. They get stuck in her bike tires. Tutus are to Skylar what jeans are to other people. I'll miss this phase when it ends.
Keri, as I remember the last few weeks and month of the deployment are the worst. The end is so close, yet you are so worn out. You have been a true wonder woman for several months and thought not once of how tired you are, then the end comes and you know help is on the way and daily tasks become harder. You are almost there!
ReplyDeleteI also love the tutu picture, is this what my world will soon be in a few years? Girly pink things, necklaces and bracelets, tutus, and hair bows? I am excited and thinking of Skylar living her collection of tutus just makes me so happy. You and Micah have two beautiful kiddos! Lots of hugs!
Thanks Amanda!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the honesty. Yes, you are blessed. We all are in some way or another but the fact that this is your husband's second year-long deployment STINKS. And it stinks that you have to go through that all by yourself and deal with all those things and I honestly don't know how you are doing it. I'm not just saying that--I have kids, I have a house, I have cars that break down--I really don't know how you are handling it!! I hope these last few weeks go by with lightning fast speed and I will join you in praying for Micah's safety and that there are no more breakdowns of any kind around those parts. You are doing a fantastic job, Keri. You really are my hero. I'm so incredibly proud of you.
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